I Need An App For That!

 

I have no shame in admitting that I've become quite the internet and smart phone junkie.  I'm the least technologically advanced person in my household, but years of battling a chronic illness tends to render one with a crapload of time on one's hands, and a desperate need to still feel connected to the outside world.  So, iPhone, iPad, netbook, bring it on...I'm now a reluctant techno addict. 

A casual glance through my iPhone will reveal a lot about my guys, since I hardly ever download apps myself.  Hmmm, let's review, there's the Facebook app (duh), YouTube (again, obviously), Fandango, Amazon and WebMD.  All very useful.  Then there's also a couple of gems like:  Compass (I don't go too far these days, but it always points me in the right direction to my bathroom), Stachematic (I look best in the handlebar version), Coin Flip (for when I need to decide if it's time to go to the ER yet or if I should tackle the monster task of taking a shower). And the family favorite, Fart for Free, handy when my GI issues and the joy of living with 2 males and a funky beagle aren't enough musical accompaniment to keep life unique and fresh, so to speak. Lately, however, it's occurred to me that while I have lots of fun, informative, and compelling apps to get me through my days, there are loads of new app ideas I can come up with that would definitely make my menoPOTS life that much easier.  Here's a few I humbly submit for Apple's consideration...

• POTSdoc App- A cross between Talking Tomcat and Siri, where you can instantly pull up a seasoned POTS or dysautonomia specialist equipped with FAQ and use it to instantly help you through a tachy or syncope crisis, or it can hologram itself to help explain your weird condition to family, friends, and the occasional stranger or EMT who might wonder why you're hanging out on the floor.  I need an app for that!

• Mother Says App- Perhaps something like this is out there, but I have yet to find it in the 500,000+ apps in the App Store.  Mother Says, and it's partner app Father Says, can record your voice with numerous sayings you belt out to your children on any given day.  "Did you take out the trash?"  "Pick that up!" "Did you finish your homework?"  You could easily record your own common parental rantings, in your own stern parental tone, and walk around the house pushing the magic buttons that would subsequently belt out your commands, saving your voice and energy for other more important tasks...like facebook and pintrest.  The Honey Says app would be super helpful too!  Sayings like "Did you pay that bill yet?"  "Come on, would it kill you to put down the toilet seat?"  and  "Is it happy hour yet?!?" would also be super helpful for me.  I would totally buy that app!!

• Medical Mirror-  There are many times I've looked in the mirror thinking I look like death, because I don't quite look like myself and I feel like death on the inside, only to run into a friend or acquaintance who reminds me how fabulous I look, so I must be better.  Don't get me wrong, I love getting compliments, but when you are using every fiber of your being to just get dressed and walk out the door, there are moments that you secretly wish others could see you the way you truly feel inside, if only for the better understanding factor. The Medical Mirror app would use the camera feature, so you can take a self portrait or use it just as a mirror and it would reflect back the image of how you truly feel inside.  Kinda like so:

  

  Feeling like a million bucks, thanks!
  Forty is the new 90!

   

  
  

  

  Just keep smiling...

• What Was I Saying/Doing Again?!? App- Ok, now this one has a much broader consumer base.  I know a bunch of teens, middle agers, old folks, and sickies (like myself) who get stuck in a moment of brain fog and distraction and totally lose track of what they were saying and/or doing.  This could definitely be a big seller!  Using GPS technology, Siri voice response and recording, and maybe even the camera feature, you can activate your WWISDA app to be your little eyes and ears as you roam about the day.  Hit a glitch mid sentence in a convo, roam into a room not remembering why, just ask "What Was I Saying/Doing Again?!?" and the app would automatically play back the last 20 seconds of your convo, or show you a picture/video of what you were doing 1-5 minutes previously, and/or chart a course on where you came from and the likely hood of where you were heading too.  POTS and menopause has definitely done a number on my brain, so I could REALLY use an app for that!

Well, there it is, my 2 cents for the app world.  Oh sure, there's many more random app ramblings gurgling in my foggy brain, but even just these few would help a Queenie out loads.  Too bad I'm not bright enough to produce them.  Guess I'll have to leave that part up to someone else.  Do you have a brilliant or sarcastic app idea?!  I'd love to hear it!!

 

Soup of the Day: It's The Great Pumpkin Soup, Queenie Barb!

Although often thought of as a fall season soup, pumpkin soup/bisque is a healthy option for everyone, especially those suffering from severe GI symptoms associated with POTS (ahem...like me.)  Thanks to my sorority alumni sis, Dorean, for sharing this super simple, healthy, and versatile version of a favorite soup of mine!  Give it a try, and let me know what other ingredients you like to add to it. 


Pumpkin Soup:
1 large can unsweetened pumpkin
1 small onion
2 cloves of garlic (minced)
1 large can tomato sauce
1 cup unsweetened coconut milk
1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp cayenne
salt and pepper to taste (LOTS of salt for the POTS crowd)

Saute onion and garlic in a little grapeseed or olive oil, then mix all the remaining ingredients together in a big pot and heat thoroughly.  It's great on its own, or as a base adding rice, chicken, sausage, steak, black beans and cilantro...well, you get the picture.  Enjoy!

5 Things I Learned From A Marathon

I'm up early this morning!  The weather is perfect in sunny So Cal for the Surf City Marathon and Half Marathon and I'm prepping for the big event.  I've layered my clothes, got my phone by my side, an extra large bottle of Powerade and water with me, had a light snack, and I'm mere minutes away from the start of the half marathon...that I'm not participating in.  But one of my dearest friends is running the half marathon this morning, which means more to me than today's Super Bowl event, because she's running it in my honor!  Just  5 months ago I completed my last half marathon, today I can barely complete a mile due to my disabling relapse.

In the last 8 years, I have completed 3 full marathons, and 4 half marathon.  I've walked every one of them since I've never been able to handle running.   Last year alone in my attempt to will myself back to good health, I walked the LA Marathon in the pouring frigid rain (I have an adversarial relationship with that marathon,) and finished 3 half marathons.  Each of the 3 half marathons I completed with a newbie half marathoner  by my side, including my mom who successfully completed her first ever halfer at the ripe age of 79!  2011 was to be the year I got better, if by shear determination alone, and the marathoning was going to get me there.  I was to complete my last half marathon of the year with my dear friend, Betsy,  in October, as it was her first half marathon attempt ever.  But my health started tanking again, another Mayo Clinic visit was on the horizon, and I hadn't been formally diagnosed with POTS and NCS yet, so there were still several unknowns as to why I couldn't get myself right.  My friend went on to complete her goal, as I watched her from the start line...just another cheering face in the crowd.

It's safe to say that pretty much anyone who completes a half or full marathon can attest to the power of personal accomplishment it gives you when it's over.  It's addicting to most who rise to and complete the challenge. I'm no different, it's been my lifeline, coping tool, and sanity saver since I started long distance walking over the last 20 years.  It teaches you so much about yourself, your capabilities and life in general.  Racing in marathons and half marathons has given me five key lessons that help me get through every day, even when I can barely walk around the block.

        #1 Every Accomplishment Starts With The First Step ~  It's so easy to talk yourself out of trying.  Excuses and over thinking can squash a dream in minutes.  Sucking it up, inhaling a deep breath, and taking that first step is all that's needed to overcome your fears and start conquering your goals.

        #2 Listen To Your Body And Make Adjustments As Needed~ Many of us, including myself, are guilty of ignoring our body's signals.  We either avoid what it's telling us, deny that it's yelling at us to take care of it, or spend too much time being afraid of what it might tell us later.  The truth is, you only know what you know right this moment.  In marathon terms, if you have a blister, you can tend to it at the next aid station.  If you have a cramp, you can massage it and work through the pain.  If you have severe chest pains, you have to stop and evaluate it.  Not every physical crisis is an emergency, but your body is always trying to speak to you.  You are your own expert.  Listen to it and act accordingly. 

      #3 Every Challenge, Great or Small, Can Be Broken Down Into Smaller Pieces To Conquer ~ This is a biggie for me!  No matter what size mountain you are facing, they're all made out of smaller pieces of sand or rocks.  Everything can be broken down into bite size manageable bits.  Sometimes it's easier to look at your feet as you move forward then at the long horizon ahead of you.  I'm practicing this lesson at this very moment. 

      #4 Setbacks Can't Break You If You Just Get Up And Try Again~ Frustration, setbacks, the feeling like you aren't making any progress, are all very real in the marathon training world.  Having faith that your consistency and efforts are ultimately giving you strength and focus in the long run, can take you farther than you may realize.  Everyone falls.  It's those of us that get back up over and over again that accomplish their goals, big and small.  I'm practicing this one a lot lately too! 

      #5 No Matter How Slow You Are, You Can Still Finish If You Don't Lose Focus Of Your Goal~ Impatience and feeling like you're the slowest person around can damage your ego and keep you from attaining what you want.  I have spent the majority of my races in close to last place.  BUT, I ALWAYS end up passing many others who either sprinted off without pacing themselves, didn't train properly, or stopped and didn't bother starting back up again.  I am the tortoise in the marathon world, but you know what?!  I still finish and get the same medal that everyone else gets.  You don't have to be the best to be great, you just have to finish!

While my friend is off running along side the beach in my honor this morning, I'm at home pale and weak typing on my blog, but inspired to stay my course, get out of this horrible POTS slump, one day at a time, one step at a time, no matter how many times I fall, or how long it takes.  I don't have to be the best to be great...I just have to finish!  Go get 'em Betsy girl!!  I am by your side in spirit, dear friend!  Long live the Queenies!!!

And She Lived (blankety blankety blank) Ever After?!?

Oh beloved sweet childhood fairy tales!  You know, the ones that lay out the course of lofty desires for little girls.  The ones that generally kill off the mother (why do they do that?!?!- I'm talking about you, Bambi, Snow White, and Cinderella) and then show young impressionable girlettes what can be yours no matter how smart or stupid you are, even if you're poor.  As long as you are pretty, you too, can find your Prince Charming, get hitched and live "happily ever after" (until you become a mom.)  Good old Disney, et al, are like the Tony Robbins of the little girl realm- pumping up fairy tale minded females with a can do attitude of marriage and happiness for all the days to come.  Whoa!  Back up a second...hey, what did happen exactly to ALL those fairy tale moms who keeled off?  Since their daughters all became princesses, doesn't that kinda make those moms Queenies?  Where are the Queenies in the fairy tales?  Why is it only about the princesses?  WHAT HAPPENED TO MY QUEENIE SISTERS?

To a certain degree, I followed the fairy tale formula.  Had some bumps growing up, got an education, (kept my mom alive, but dad's pretty much AWOL,)  found the prince at a sorority party, married the prince 5 years later, traveled, produced the perfect heir to the thrown (which made me a mother-this will be important later) and 10 years after that, the proverbial shit hit the royal fan!  One day, my life turned on a dime, and I've been desperately trying to get it back ever since.

Oh dear, this is doesn't look good for our Queenie...

I'll spare the gory details, but 3 years later with 3 Mayo Clinic visits and 3 months in a major POTS flare up, that's working on severely disabling me, I'm at the "now what happens?" stage of chronic illness.  I've been spending some serious quality time in this stage since my flare up, set back, relapse, whatever you want to call it.  I've had an unofficial POTS diagnosis since April 2010, but trying to get my estrogen replacement therapy and Hashimoto's thyroid disease balanced properly was the priority at the time, so POTS was put aside until those priorities were better managed.  It took another 17 months to finally add POTS and NCS to my growing list of newfound health issues since my surgical hysterectomy 3 years ago. The tilt table test and neuro-dynamics testing needed to nail down my diagnosis exacerbated my symptoms (understatement) and I've been declining ever since, even while experimenting with the standard POTS treatment protocol.  It gets me thinking, "is this how it all went down for those fairy tale moms?"

My condition(s) aren't fatal, but I still can't help but wonder if my fairy tale is over.  Is this the part of my story where the Queenie Mum no longer gets mentioned cause she's OMG type sick and doesn't get out much?  Or will I have the miracle recovery that will be worthy of a People Magazine cover story or at least inspire a solid Mystery Diagnosis episode?  I'm being brutally honest to tell you that it weighs heavily on me.  Medical specialists at Mayo Clinic tell me my prognosis is good (whatever that means.)  I will likely improve (whatever that means) with time...lots and lots and lots of time.  My age is against me (kinda rude), along with the fact that I have multiple ongoing conditions like surgical menopause, Hashimoto's disease, and psoriasis.  But the fact that I did gain some ground the year before is a good indicator that I can and will come out of this physical slump.  I'm hopeful, but I also feel physically tortured and exhausted every single day now.  I don't drive much, it's a major feat to get dressed, it's difficult to concentrate on even the simplest tasks, and exercise is getting harder and harder.  I'm weakened, but my will and spirit is not broken.  I still believe that my fairy tale will have a happy ending.  I will regain my strength, stabilize my health, renew my spirit, and emerge from this crisis the Queenie I was born to be.  How do I know this for sure?  Simple. I still have my heroic prince, my shining heir, a supportive royal court of family and friends, even MY Queenie mom is still here by my side (take THAT fairy tale mommy killers!!)  And deep within my being, I still have the mighty armor that protects me in my darkest hours, every day, every step of the way..I still have hope!