Let me just start off by saying that I think most people in American society are prone to some type of overindulgence. The freedoms afforded us by our Constitution lend an atmosphere of doing what you please because you have free will and excessive access to just about anything your heart desires. Addictions arise when those habits, or indulgences that we allow ourselves are abused and turn harmful to our well being.
That being said, I have a confession. I have an addiction. Now, it might be a "soft" addiction (thanks for the term Reader's Digest), but it's been harmful none the less. As a matter of fact, I partially blame my addiction for my health woes and the worst part, everyone who knows me, knows I was addicted! Now's the time to openly put it out there because admitting it is the first step to recovery. So here goes...
I'm addicted to "yes." That's right, I have a brutally hard time saying "no!" Don't laugh, I'm serious (ok, you can laugh a little.) I have led most of my life trying to be a people pleaser, and being the go to gal for just about anything and everything people asked of me. I didn't see the harm in being like that. How could you be too accomodating?!? That never made sense to me. Until I got sick. It literally stopped my life in it's tracks and yet even then, I still continued the habitual drive to say "yes."
It was a "yes" to a doctor I never completely felt comfortable with that cost me the worst mistake of my life...my hysterectomy. It was a "yes" to another doctor that caused me to experiment with biodentical hormones for over a year that ultimately landed me in the hospital and a subsequent 3 week stint at Mayo Clinic. It was a series of "yeses" that brought on way too much volunteer, social, and commitment workload that overtaxed my body. Everyone around me could see it, but it took a major life altering upheaval for me to acknowledge it.
Are you skeptical?!? Not buying into the burden of "yes?" I don't blame you, I was the same way. How could being helpful be a bad thing? A person who says "yes" has a can do attitude and can't that only make the world a better place? Sure! When it's in moderation. Like most things bad for you, a little is good, but a lot is not.
Now that I've had some time to step back some from the addiction, I can see how I derailed from the positive aspects of saying "yes" by taking on way too much that it really was affecting my health and taking away from what's most important to me. You see, I hardly ever said "no," so I kept adding on and adding on and adding on until I was running through my days at lightening speed, barely slowing down enough to breath. It took my health collapsing for me to physically stop and forcing me to start using the word "no."
I doubt I'll ever be comfortable with that word. When I was a "yes" gal, I was a team player, I could make things happen, I was a doer. Saying "no" means I can't do it all. And you know what?!? I can't. None of us can. It took this type of intervention to see that my addiction to "yes" was robbing me and my family of quality of life. Just because you want to do it all, you wish you could do it all, doesn't mean you should. When you stop the cycle, you start replacing quantity with quality. One of the toughest lessons I've ever had to learn.
So, I take life one day at a time now. I'm not totally comfortable with that, but I know it's the right thing for me and those I love most. Just because I'm trying not to be a "yes" gal anymore, doesn't mean I still don't have a lot to offer and that a sprinkling of "yes" here and there ultimately lends to a happier and healthier lifestyle. What do you think?!? I'd love to hear your feedback and maybe, this just might be your intervention too!
